Today I got triggered by a bottle of vodka, and I needed to consult my inner child to figure out why. I was eating my breakfast at the kitchen table when my husband pulled off the shelf the jar of vanilla we began "brewing" last week and the bottle of vodka we used to get things started. He wanted to compare the color of the vanilla to the vodka. Nothing threatening in that, right? Except that I suddenly felt a grip of fear around my heart. In the past, I might have ignored it, or more likely tried to chalk it up to what I was eating. But I've stopped running. The shadow can no longer hide in the darkness. I will turn on the light and face it every time, as I did a little while ago.
Recognizing or feeling the feeling is only half the battle, I've come to realize. It's asking the next question, "Why?," that really starts the healing ball rolling. Powerful post.
Thank you, Jessica. You're right. It's sort of like the difference between waking up and getting out of bed, isn't it? But whether we'll still under the sheets or not, we should be proud of ourselves for finally refusing to go through life asleep.
I'm glad you're telling your story, Mom, and that you're listening to Little Cheryl. ❤️
Recognizing or feeling the feeling is only half the battle, I've come to realize. It's asking the next question, "Why?," that really starts the healing ball rolling. Powerful post.
Thank you, Jessica. You're right. It's sort of like the difference between waking up and getting out of bed, isn't it? But whether we'll still under the sheets or not, we should be proud of ourselves for finally refusing to go through life asleep.